East Coast Earthquake

Did Obama cause the historic earthquake that shook the Eastern U.S?   Of course he did.   He's covering up his unspecified failures at governing.  The Washington Monument?  He had it cracked before the terrorists could get to it.  Obviously.

Palin would never had let this happen.

The new MLK memorial is just fine.  Obama would never let anything happen to that!   And he's just trying to get more money out of Congress with the excuse it will go to earthquake repairs.   Yeah, sure, we all know it's going to welfare mothers in Chicago.

Unfounded  paranoia is fun!  Maybe we could write for the Tea Party?

Top Ten Reasons to Join the Tea Party

Why would you want to become a member of the newest political trend?  Easy, it's trendy!   Here are some reasons to use when you friends ask you what the hell you were thinking.


Ten Reasons To Join the Tea Party

10. You can be angry at almost everybody.  Blacks, Mexicans, Jews, gays, and all the other people that aren't real Americans (just don't check the make-up of the armed forces).

9.  You might get to shoot something with Sarah Palin.

8.  You might get lucky with Bristol Palin.

7.  You'll have a reason to give back those Social Security checks the evil government keeps sending.

6.  You might get to meet beautiful/crazy Ann Coulters.

5.  If you're a black female you can be the only one in the party.  I mean, look what it did for Michael Steele.

4.  It's easier to show up in cutoff shorts and a tank top than having to put on those Klan robes.

3.  There are tons of cool Tea Party camo t-shirts available on e Bay.

2.  You might get to help build the fence across the Mexican border with Joe the Plumber.

1.  Party membership looks good on your resumé for that Walmart job.



One Reason to Join the Tequila Party

Teabonics

Teabonics = unique and creative usage of the English language in Tea Party protests.

This guy hates morans.
But he's fine with his moron brothers, of course.

See, the Founding Fathers were right-wingers
Even ol' Bene

Speaking English mandatory
Writing not so much apparently

Which prison?

No more boarders!  Let them stay elsewhere!

The latest theory by the Tea Partiers is that liberal infiltrators are purposely writing these signs to make them look stupid.   We have been caught red-handed.  Some of our members after perhaps one (or five) too many shots of tequila may just have written up a sign and joined the festivities.   Not because they are mean-spirited, but because they thought it was Mardi Gras.  We'll call their tequila-fueled use of the language Tequilabonics.

The Tequila Party is a big fan of the Tea Party

We love the Tea Party.   Well, actually it doesn't have to be a party.   We can drink tea with or without a big group of people and loud music.   But it's especially good in cold weather or when you just want to relax.

This is what the Tea Party is all about.  Right?

But there's always a shot of tequila, hot tea, and a slice of lemon in a mug -- a great way to relax from a tough day!   Now that's a Tea Party!